The Incest Taboo - Incest as an Autoerotic Social and Cultural Act - The
Offspring of Aeolus
On the Incest Taboo
The Offspring of Aeolus
Incest as an Autoerotic Social and Cultural Act
By:
Dr. Sam Vaknin
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"...An experience with an adult may seem merely a curious
and pointless game, or it may be a hideous trauma leaving lifelong psychic
scars. In many cases the reaction of parents and society determines the child's
interpretation of the event. What would have been a trivial and soon-forgotten
act becomes traumatic if the mother cries, the father rages, and the police
interrogate the child."
(Encyclopedia Britannica, 2004 Edition)
In contemporary thought, incest is invariably associated with
child abuse and its horrific, long-lasting, and often irreversible consequences. Incest is not such a clear-cut matter as it has
been made out to be over millennia of taboo. Many participants
claim to have enjoyed the act and its physical and emotional
consequences. It is often the result of seduction. In some cases,
two consenting and fully informed adults are involved.
Many types
of relationships, which are defined as incestuous, are between
genetically unrelated parties (a stepfather and a daughter), or
between fictive kin or between classificatory kin (that belong to
the same matriline or patriline). In certain societies (the Native American or
the Chinese) it is sufficient to carry the same family name (=to belong to the
same clan) and marriage is forbidden.
Some incest prohibitions relate to sexual acts - others to
marriage. In some societies, incest is mandatory or prohibited, according to the
social class (Bali, Papua New Guinea, Polynesian and Melanesian islands). In
others, the Royal House started a tradition of incestuous marriages, which was
later imitated by lower classes (Ancient Egypt, Hawaii, Pre-Columbian Mixtec).
Some societies are more tolerant of consensual incest than others (Japan, India
until the 1930's, Australia).
The list is long and it serves to demonstrate the diversity of
attitudes towards this most universal of taboos. Generally put, we can say that
a prohibition to have sex with or marry a related person should be classified as
an incest prohibition.
Perhaps the strongest feature of incest has
been hitherto downplayed: that it is, essentially, an autoerotic
act.
Having sex with a first-degree blood relative is like having
sex with oneself. It is a Narcissistic act and like all acts
Narcissistic, it involves the objectification of the partner. The
incestuous Narcissist over-values and then devalues his sexual
partner. He is devoid of empathy (cannot see the other's point of
view or put himself in her shoes).
For an in depth treatment of
narcissism and its
psychosexual dimension, see these (click on the links):
Narcissistic and Psychopathic Parents and Their Children
Narcissistic Personality
Disorder (NPD) and Pathological Narcissism FAQs
Personality disorders
FAQs
Paradoxically, it is the reaction of
society that transforms incest into such a disruptive phenomenon.
The condemnation, the horror, the revulsion and the attendant social sanctions
interfere with the internal processes and dynamics of the incestuous family.
It is from society that the child learns that something is
horribly wrong, that he should feel guilty, and that the offending parent
is a defective role model.
As a direct result, the formation of the child's Superego is stunted and it
remains infantile, ideal, sadistic, perfectionist, demanding and
punishing. The child's Ego, on the other hand, is likely to be replaced
by a False Ego version, whose job it is to suffer the social consequences of the hideous act.
To sum up: society's reactions in the case of incest are
pathogenic and are most likely to produce a
Narcissistic or a Borderline patient. Dysempathic, exploitative, emotionally
labile, immature, and in eternal search for
Narcissistic Supply – the child becomes a replica of his incestuous and
socially-castigated parent.
If so, why did human societies develop such pathogenic
responses? In other words, why is incest considered a taboo in all known human
collectives and cultures? Why are incestuous liaisons treated so harshly and
punitively?
Freud said that incest provokes horror because
it touches upon our forbidden, ambivalent emotions towards
members of our close family. This ambivalence covers both
aggression towards other members (forbidden and punishable) and (sexual)
attraction to them (doubly forbidden and punishable).
Edward Westermarck proffered an opposite view that the
domestic proximity of the members of the family breeds sexual repulsion (the
epigenetic rule known as the Westermarck effect) to counter naturally occurring
genetic sexual attraction. The incest taboo simply reflects
emotional and biological realities within the family rather than aiming to
restrain the inbred instincts of its members, claimed Westermarck.
Though much-disputed by geneticists, some scholars maintain
that the incest taboo may have been originally designed to prevent the
degeneration of the genetic stock of the clan or tribe through intra-family
breeding (closed endogamy). But, even if true, this no longer applies. In today's world incest
rarely results in pregnancy and the transmission of genetic
material. Sex today is about recreation as much as procreation.
Good contraceptives should, therefore, encourage
incestuous, couples. In many other species inbreeding or straightforward incest
are the norm. Finally, in most countries, incest prohibitions apply also to non-genetically-related
people.
It seems, therefore, that the incest taboo was and is aimed at
one thing in particular: to preserve the family unit and its proper functioning.
Incest is more than a mere manifestation
of a given personality disorder or a paraphilia (incest is
considered by many to be a subtype of pedophilia). It harks back to
the very nature of the family. It is closely entangled with its
functions and with its contribution to the development of the
individual within it.
The family is an efficient
venue for the transmission of accumulated property as well as information - both horizontally (among family members) and
vertically (down the generations). The process of socialization largely relies
on these familial mechanisms, making the family the most important agent of
socialization by far.
The family is a mechanism for the allocation of
genetic and material wealth. Worldly goods are passed on from one generation to
the next through succession, inheritance and residence. Genetic material is
handed down through the sexual act. It is the mandate of the family to increase
both by accumulating property and by marrying outside the family (exogamy).
Clearly, incest prevents both. It preserves a limited genetic
pool and makes an increase of material possessions through intermarriage all but
impossible.
The family's roles are not merely materialistic, though.
One of the main businesses of the family is to
teach to its members self control, self regulation and healthy
adaptation. Family members share space and resources and siblings share the mother's emotions and attention.
Similarly, the family educates its young members to master their
drives and to postpone the self-gratification which
attaches to acting upon them.
The incest taboo conditions children
to control their erotic drive by abstaining from ingratiating
themselves with members of the opposite sex within the same
family. There could be little question that incest constitutes a
lack of control and impedes the proper separation of impulse (or
stimulus) from action.
Additionally, incest probably
interferes with the defensive aspects of the family's existence.
It is through the family that aggression is legitimately channeled, expressed and externalized. By imposing discipline
and hierarchy on its members, the family is transformed into a
cohesive and efficient war machine. It absorbs economic resources, social status
and members of other families. It forms alliances and fights other clans over
scarce goods, tangible and intangible.
This efficacy is undermined by incest. It is virtually
impossible to maintain discipline and hierarchy in an incestuous family where
some members assume sexual roles not normally theirs. Sex is an expression of
power – emotional and physical. The members of the family involved in incest
surrender power and assume it out of the regular flow patterns that have made
the family the formidable apparatus that it is.
These new power politics weaken the family, both internally
and externally. Internally, emotive reactions (such as the jealousy of other
family members) and clashing authorities and responsibilities are likely to undo
the delicate unit. Externally, the family is vulnerable to ostracism and more
official forms of intervention and dismantling.
Finally, the family is an identity endowment mechanism. It
bestows identity upon its members. Internally, the members of the family derive
meaning from their position in the family tree and its "organization chart"
(which conform to societal expectations and norms). Externally, through exogamy,
by incorporating "strangers", the family absorbs other identities and thus
enhances social solidarity (Claude Levy-Strauss) at the expense of the
solidarity of the nuclear, original family.
Exogamy, as often noted, allows for the creation of extended
alliances. The "identity creep" of the family is in total opposition to incest.
The latter increases the solidarity and cohesiveness of the incestuous family –
but at the expense of its ability to digest and absorb other identities of other
family units. Incest, in other words, adversely affects social cohesion and
solidarity.
Lastly, as aforementioned, incest interferes with
well-established and rigid patterns of inheritance and property allocation. Such
disruption is likely to have led in primitive societies to disputes and
conflicts - including armed clashes and deaths. To prevent such recurrent and
costly bloodshed was one of the intentions of the incest taboo.
The more primitive the society, the more strict and elaborate
the set of incest prohibitions and the fiercer the reactions of society to violations.
It appears that the less violent the dispute settlement methods and mechanisms
in a given culture – the more lenient the attitude to incest.
The incest taboo is, therefore, a
cultural trait. Protective of the efficient mechanism of the
family, society sought to minimize disruption to its activities
and to the clear flows of authority, responsibilities, material
wealth and information horizontally and vertically.
Incest
threatened to unravel this magnificent creation - the family. Alarmed by the
possible consequences (internal and external feuds, a rise in the
level of aggression and violence) – society introduced the
taboo. It came replete with physical and emotional sanctions:
stigmatization, revulsion and horror, imprisonment, the
demolition of the errant and socially mutant family cell.
As long as societies revolve around the
relegation of power, its sharing, its acquisition and dispensation – there will
always exist an incest taboo. But in a different societal and cultural setting, it is
conceivable not to have such a taboo. We can easily imagine a society where
incest is extolled, taught, and practiced - and out-breeding is regarded with
horror and revulsion.
The incestuous marriages among members of the
royal households of Europe were intended to preserve the familial property and
expand the clan's territory. They were normative, not aberrant. Marrying an
outsider was considered abhorrent.
An incestuous society - where incest is the norm
- is conceivable even today.
Two out of many possible scenarios:
1. "The Lot Scenario"
A plague or some other natural disaster decimate the population of planet Earth.
People remain alive only in isolated clusters, co-habiting only with their
closest kin. Surely incestuous procreation is preferable to virtuous
extermination. Incest becomes normative.
Incest is as entrenched a taboo as cannibalism. Yet, it is better to eat the
flesh of your dead football team mates than perish high up on the Andes (a
harrowing tale of survival recounted in the book and eponymous film, "Alive").
2. The Egyptian Scenario
Resources become so scarce that family units scramble to keep them exclusively
within the clan.
Exogamy - marrying outside the clan - amounts to a unilateral transfer of scarce
resources to outsiders and strangers. Incest becomes an economic imperative.
An incestuous society would be either
utopian or dystopian, depending on the reader's point of view - but that it is
possible is doubtless.
Also Read
Sex or Gender
The
Narcissist's Family
The Roots of
Pedophilia
The Pathology of Love
The Natural Roots of Sexuality
Parenting - The Irrational
Vocation
Ethical Relativism and Absolute
Taboos
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